A Year of Changing Skies and a Difficult Goodbye: 2020

When I look back at the skies I photographed in 2020, I remember far more than sunrises and sunsets. It was a year of uncertainty, fear, and loss—but it was also a year of change, healing, and unexpected gratitude. The pandemic forced life to slow down, and in that stillness, I began listening to what had been waiting quietly within me. I started drafting Searching for Faerie, Finding Me and soon began painting it. We hunkered down in our condominium, grateful that it kept us safe and sane and my August, moved into a house where I finally had room to paint. I also traveled for work to northern Nevada and the open roads and landscapes gave me space to breathe, think, and process. Those long drives became their own kind of therapy, to deal with heartbreak. I lost my sweet Orange - a tabby after her FIV progressed to its final stage. Because of pandemic restrictions, I could not be beside her at the end. I had to say goodbye from a distance, trusting the veterinarian to give her my final kisses and love.

For years, I tucked these photographs away as a way of coping. Finding them again, organizing them, and bringing them back into the light has lifted a heaviness I did not realize I was carrying. These sky transitions hold all of it—grief and gratitude, joy and anxiety, survival and becoming. Despite the difficulties, there was still so much more to be thankful for. And like the background song says, when I look back now, I realize that I was having the time of my life when feeling the pinch — and now looking back, I still am — having the time of my life not because everything is sunny but because the clouds and the losses make you appreciate life more.

https://youtu.be/-zEm7-AcJOQ